At long last.

This is what she would tell me, "Bakit ngayon lang?" or maybe "Dapat lang."

And then, I'll just hear about it days later, that she's told all of our relatives and all of her friends, who probably don't care much. :P

Because that's how she is and I'll always remember to be.

In our house, we are never bida. But outside, she's mighty proud of us.

I miss you and I know we're extra blessed these days because of you.

Le sigh

Half asleep, I stupidly pressed delete all messages while browsing my inbox. I thought I was inside my sent messages folder, which I regularly empty out.

Sigh.

The oldest message I had there was from 2007. When I just got the phone, I think.

What I'm most bummed about is the only message I have saved from my mom. It was just two words: Good luck! Sent September 11, 2007.

Now my inbox is empty. I hope this isn't a sign of things to come this week.

Beaming with pride

Mommy is smiling right now. I just know it. (:

The Google Meme

INSTRUCTIONS: Go to Google and type in quotation marks, your name, and then "likes to" (ex. "charles likes to"). Type in the first ten things that come up and repost in your own blog.

1. Macy likes to be casual and has a rock and roll vibe about her.
   
2. Macy likes to do lots of different things at the same time, but I don't think she'd call it multi-tasking.
   
3. So we waited two weeks to share pictures of it because we all know Macy likes to look good.
   
4. Macy's likes to think of itself as a Nordstrom.
   
5. Macy likes to play with toys she only has a ball.
   
6. Macy's likes to think of themselves as more high-end.
   
7. Macy likes to keep life simple and lowkey, melding her sweet soprano voice with the stringed instruments
   
8. Macy likes to be in charge and do what she wants to do, so she has come a long way.
   
9. Macy likes to take lots of roles where he talks on telephones.
   
10. Macy likes to lick his face, which he'll tolerate to a certain extent.

Haha! Most of it refers to Macy Gray or Macy's the Mall. XD

Let's pause for a MOMent

I remember our old house in Marikina. There was a sink in the garage-slash-backyard. Right across was our macopa tree.

And I remember this old picture taken there. I was in leotards and tights right beside my mom who was in sweat pants. We had our arms stretched out as if in dance class. That was my idea of ballet. I remember I wanted to be a ballerina so bad. I would ask my parents to take me to ballet school.

I never got around to taking ballet because, my mom would always tell me, my dad didn't want me to have no boobs and ugly toes. So yes, I am thankful, because I have non-ugly toes and... well, let's just say I don't exactly have little boy's chest. Haha! But I guess more than anything, I'm grateful because I had those "ballet lessons" in the garage with my mom. I don't remember much but I remember that picture. And I remember my smile.

Some people say it gets better and I want to believe that it does. But there are days when nothing else can make you feel better than a good cry.

Can you hear me?

I miss you.

They never mean what they say

I'm tired and battered
Worn the sole off my shoes
I'm restless and torn
Short of nothing to lose
I'm tired and battered

I always think that when I'm feeling tired, it's just a phase, like it's something that has an expiration date. But I've been feeling more and more restless these days. I find myself having trouble concentrating and always feeling like I'm carrying this huge burden.

I don't know. The past eight months... well, it's been an uphill climb. I'm getting tired. /: And I know I can't complain because we all probably feel the same way. I just need to deal with it.

These are the times when I can't help but think, everyone else's problems don't seem as big.